Communication is really a tricky art with the best of times. It’s good to understand what you want to say, nonetheless it helps should you say it in ways that your listener will understand. Years ago when I was stationed in Germany, my recently widowed mother came to get a visit. She had never left the States before, which means you was a journey for her. Actually, she took it in stride. She’s a people person, and "seeing the sites" just never was what she was considering. She probably enjoyed her stop by to a department shop in Karlsruhe in excess of the jaunt into France that any of us took her on.
It was at the variety store that I was reminded that sometimes people simply wish you to "speak their language"...a lesson I saw repeated often times during the six years I lived overseas.
In the variety store, my mother was shopping as fast as if she is at her Sears store back Pensacola, Florida. However, at some point, she had something and, not contemplating language differences, walked up to sales clerk and asked her a matter in English. The sales clerk was coldly polite, but responded in German and didn't seem to know my mother’s question.
At the period, I walked up and repeated my mother’s inquiry in German. As often happened, over broke in a smile, albeit that has a slightly surprised look to be with her face, and responded in German, "Oh! You speak German?"I responded that I did and explained that my mother was visiting in the U. S., was recently widowed, had never traveled abroad before, and, unfortunately, didn't speak German.
The sales clerk began speaking English, about as effective as my German, and answered my mother’s questions gladly. She also chatted with us to get a while, asking where my mother was from from the States, and telling us that they had a sister in Chicago together with visited there a bit back. She helped us along with the rest of our shopping in this department, and said goodbye to us just as if we were old friends whenever we left, wishing my mother a pleasing visit in Germany and also a safe trip to Florida.
I have experienced this repeated with Germany, and also in France, where I only had about six words during my arsenal. People who seemed unwilling to assist or uncertain regarding how to act inside my presence became animated, friendly, and helpful when I showed a willingness to talk with them in their own personal language, or perhaps meet them nearly in a lively game of charades. Quick now, how will you say, "my two year old daughter must utilize bathroom" in a very foreign language? The clock was ticking on that you.
There is yet another scene which I have often observed at the same time, and yes it could indicate why people in outside the country do not always rush to assist visitors. Once, in the railway coach in Germany, two Americans sat discussing loudly, in English, how terrible it absolutely was that the people there would not speak English. They were oblivious that several from the Germans within earshot DID apparently speak English. The Americans complained loud and long about how exactly difficult it absolutely was to shop, order lunch, or benefit from the sights without becoming lost when nobody spoke "their" language.
I wonder what percentage of those types of people the saleslady in the variety store had encountered? How much more would that American couple have enjoyed their trip to Germany when they had simply taken some time to learn quick phrases together attempted to talk in German? Who knows what number of helpful salesladies would've emerged through the shadows to assist them...even perhaps in English?How often, whether operating or in our personal relationships, have we judged others by their reply to our attempt to talk to them? How often times in those moments of potential friendship and good fellowship, or dire need, have we been busy expressing our demands and expectations as opposed to speaking words that others could, and can be willing to, understand.
It could possibly be unfortunate, but true, a large number of of us are victims of our own own curiosity about ourselves, or our uncertainty around the intentions of others. Many a salesman will advise you that a simple method to sell something would be to present the advantages to the customer, not hammer out a summary of what YOU believe include the "selling points" from the product. Many an effective network marketer has learned any particular one of the best strategies to "sell" should be to simply be a reliable friend and confidant, prepared to listen and attempt to understand. The friends created in this way become the "network" which helps promote the consumer in an ever expanding circle and enables bring potential customers towards the marketer.
Certainly, others have a similar obligation even as we to take the steps to increase all sorts of communication between people. However, when they have not had the opportunity to master how to accomplish that, or whenever they have never met someone able to speak for them in "their language", then you end up being the one while using opportunity to expand your circle of wonderful and exciting relationships. Perhaps even a variety of them will see whatever you did and exactly how you did it and definately will teach that lesson to others also.
It is often a simple lesson, you recognize. If we just need to incorporate some friends in order to get some help, as opposed to voicing our needs, wants, and desires in a fashion that seems to expect the listener to know us, we try speak to them in their own individual language.